Sex, drugs, rock and roll!

What can you get away with whilst child rearing? It’s a fine line isn’t it.

Sex, drugs, rock and roll, is just a saying, but it refers to a lifestyle – one where people act rather irresponsibly all the time, partying, and having a good old giggle. When you fall pregnant with your first child you automatically assume that all the nice, fun, and often disgraceful things that you did beforehand will become a distant memory, and you will spend most of your time feeding and cleaning up bodily fluids. That part is true, you will have to change nappies, and prepare bottles, and rock your baby to sleep every few hours, however you can also make time to do the this YOU enjoy.

It’s all about preparation. I get all my bottles sterilized before bed, and then do the used ones again in the morning. That way I always have enough ready for the day. I always pack the changing bag at night ready for the next day so that when I’m hungover I don’t forget anything. I change the kids bedding in the morning so that getting them to bed is a quicker task. Basically if you do everything before it needs doing, you will find the fun comes a lot easier as you will always know you haven’t got a load of stuff to do at the end of it all.

Make sure you spend a reasonable amount of time getting you children off to sleep to make sure then are truly asleep and not going to wake up as soon as you leave the room. One of them almost certainly will, but you DO NOT entertain them. Send them straight back to bed without so much as a look – they WILL get the message eventually.

Then the fun begins. Have the sex first because you don’t want to be drunk, however if you are a cannabis user, smoke first, as it will only enhance your pleasure. Rock and roll if you like – that’s what babysitters are for, and you can find very reputable and well qualified ones nowadays. I favour staying in and having friends over or going to friends houses, but I do still enjoy the odd nightclub here and there. Don’t be scared of the drink or the drugs, see them as your go to buddies. If you allow yourself to relax, your kids will relax more. There is nothing worse than being uptight all the time where children are concerned. Let them have what they want, and they will let you. It’s just FAIRNESS.

You will however have to accept that you will get less sleep than you are used to as even if you don’t drink every night, you will still want time to yourself once they’re in bed. And if you feel like it, drink during the day then you won’t have to rush the bottle at night. As long as you haven’t got a million chores to do during the day you will be able to get as pissed as you like.

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